Perceptions

Bismillah. In The name of Allah Ar Rahman Ar Rahim

INTRODUCTION

I think we all have heard of this, but never really apply it in our head and life.

All of us, we are living based on our perceptions. Perceptions or persepsi, bermaksud:  a way of interpreting something. We are living based on how we interpret things. So it is very important that we are aware of this.

Our happiness is not outside to inside. "In order to become happy, live in a happy environment." - NO. If you want you soul to feel the happiness, in must be inside to outside. Means whatever your condition outside, you are happy from the inside.

And our INSIDE is strongly affected by our PERCEPTIONS on life. How we see things we have been seeing. PERCEPTIONS are strongly affected by our MENTAL ATTITUDE. Are we positive people? Berfikiran jauh? Banyak berfikir tentang Allah dan hikmah? Banyak berfikir tentang diri atau orang lain? That is our mental attitude. Sorryla kalau bahasa motivasi aku ada tersalah ke apa. I am just pouring what's inside me right now.

The point that I am writing this is because I once had and still have a huge challenge in controlling my inner. I think everyone pun sama. Once we acquire skills to remain happy in this situation, Allah akan move kan kita ke next level by introducing another challenges and test our inner strength. It's always like that. So LIFE, is like a struggle and a war with your inside. It actually has nothing to do with another people!

"You only compete with yourself." Rupanya, the meaning is too deep.

One of the way for me to stay strong is to write a blog about this. Bukannya untuk menasihati orang lain. Tapi bila segala monolog dalaman aku dengan diri sendiri, and I write it down, it becomes something more solid than before.

I received a comment about my previous entry praising me saying "Being positive all the time is just not human". And I was like, "No no no... you don't get it do you? I blog because I am telling myself in a stronger ways, to be positive." When I am writing right now, it's 5% for you, and 95% for me. What you blogged reflects YOU. If you kerap marah-marah, that is what you always tell yourself. (I've been there trust me. That's why I have deleted many entries of the past. It's just too...immature... too emotional)

So perceptions. We often tell ourselves, "Ignore negative people." "Don't waste your time thinking about people who hurt you." Bla bla bla. It's always more important to think about How to overcome these people that has bad effect in our lives. And after 19 years of living and guarding myself from these people, I realised new thing.

"Have we ever told ourselves HOW to avoid being in these group of people to another person??"

WE ARE THE NEGATIVE PEOPLE?

AHAH! At one point we thought we have achieved something. And the next moment I was like....falling.

How do we see others? Especially the people we like less?

When people hurt us, do they really hurt us or we are the one allowing ourselves being hurt?

When we were chatting, and some words came out of our friends mouth, and it's actually hurting us. But do they really intend to hurt us? Or are we making up our negative mind on them? And we started to assume. And we feel so depressed. And BOOM! There goes, "I HATE THIS PERSON!!" inside us.

And that person really has no idea about it. -__-"

Ofcourse, aku takdela nak kata kita kena perfect sangat. Sebab sometimes, untuk kebaikan bersama kita kena tunjukkan juga kita tak suka sesuatu yang mengganggu kita atau kehidupan kita. We have to stand up for it!! I am just talking about something very general here. About our perceptions.

We often started to hate everything that comes out from people we hate. And that's already our emotion talking. Not our mind. We don't like something they said? It's okay. We don't like them? It's not okay. Then we have already being the "haters" that we have always trying to avoid all these while.

Quran pun mention tentang persepsi kita terhadap orang lain. PERCEPTIONS = SANGKAAN. Sangkaan is just what we thought about people. And in the Quran, it is stated, jauhkan diri dari menyangka, untuk mengelakkan sangkaan yang dilarang.

“Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Jauhilah kebanyakan dari sangkaan (supaya kamu tidak menyangka sangkaan yang dilarang) kerana sesungguhnya sebahagian dari sangkaan itu adalah dosa ..."(Al Hujurat 49: 12)

NAMIMAH DAN MENGUMPAT

Antara perkara yang boleh menyebabkan sangkaan buruk juga adalah Namimah. Rasulullah melarang 'Namimah'. Namimah adalah kelas hadis pertama yang aku pernah hadiri pada zaman lepas sekolah dulu, oleh kelas ustazah Aisyah. It stays fresh in my mind. Bukan mengumpat je berdosa. Namimah itu pun suara-suara syaitan jugak.Namimah ni melibatkan 3 orang.

A = Berkata sesuatu tentang C pada B, sama ada marah atau mengumpat ke. Tapi dosa dia kat mengumpat/menghina tu je. Atau tiada dosa pun kalau dia sekadar meluahkan.

B = B rasa nak bagi tau C. Kononnya tanggungjawab.

C = Rasa marah sangat mendengar A mengata belakang.

Yang paling berdosa kat sini bukannya A atau C. Tetapi B, si penyampai. B yang wujudkan marah dalam hati C. Kalau tak cakap langsung, tak adalah api kemarahan kan? Macam tulah.

Telah datang seorang lelaki kepada Hassan al-Basri lalu berkata: 

“ Sesungguhnya si fulan bercakap sesuatu tentang kamu “. Lalu beliau menjawab : “ Tiadakah utusan syaitan selain engkau ?”

Namimah adalah mengadu domba, seperti seseorang berkata kepada kawannya, (katakan namanya Mr. J.)

“Hei Mr. J., 'you' tau tak, Miss World cakap 'you' ni tak berapa pandai dalam hall itu dan ini, tengok banyak assignments 'you' yang tak siap’ Mungkin n mungkin perkataan tadi boleh menyebabkan Mr. J. membenci Miss World dan mungkin boleh menyebabkan mereka bergaduh dan bermasam muka.

Rasulullah SAW bersabda:

Tidak akan masuk syurga orang yang melakukan namimah (HR Bukhari dan Muslim)

Beratnya namimah kerana mewujudkan api kemarahan yang tidak sepatutnya ada.

Perception jugak, bila diluahkan, akan menjadi mengumpat tak tentu pasal. Walhal yang diumpat tu hanyalah perception.

"Dia cakap mcm ni ni ni."

"Hah yeke?"

"Kalau die boleh mention mcm tu...maknanya memang dia nii..."--mula buat assumption dan cerita sendiri yang semakin panjang.

"Ya Allah teruknya..."

Bla bla bla leads to mengumpat.

WASTED SOUL

Try to imagine yourself loose. You aren't attach to anything in this world. You are focusing on Jannah. And you reflect back all the things you have done, said, and etc. You will actually realize that all the perceptions we have on others, either they hurt us on purpose or not, are actually useless. And another day you spend thinking bad about them, dalam keadaan kita tak tahu pun mungkin Allah dah ampunkan dosa dia, it just another way to waste you soul. WASTED. Wasted by only bad perceptions on others.

BEING THANKFUL

Therefore, nak summarize daripada kesemuanya. Happiness is from within. No matter what people do and say, if we are negative inside, we will get hurt. If we are positive inside, we wont get hurt or even if we feel hurt, it's not for long. SO ALWAYS SEEK FOR YOUR INNER HAPPINESS, which is as a Muslim is remembrance of Allah and why we live in this world.

Fuhh... so that's all on me. I am very thankful for everyone I ever hated because of them, I am enlighten that hatred leads to no where and Allah might have forgiven them and I am left alone in something that Allah tak suka!! I am truly grateful of everyone that ever hurts me because the first person who hurts me brings me years of pain but the 100th person to hurt me brings me light of remembering Allah more. I am truly grateful of every single person who comes in my life, because all the exposures is a practice of patience, gratitude, tolerance, and the newest thing I learn is LOVE and MERCY for the sake of Allah.

I am truly thankful for everyone who has been kind to me. You are the remedy and medicine in every hurts and pains.

Lastly, THANK YOU ALLAH, for always guiding me even though I don't deserve this. May Allah grant us Jannah.

Kata penutup, aku mengarang hari ini hanyalah monolog dalaman that I took years of fighting inside and finally I understood this. It has nothing to do with anyone else. umpama open diary ;)